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Don't Buy It Before You PriceSCAN It!

Thursday, February 05, 2004

Today's Stock Market Report: 

Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary.
Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.
Knives were up sharply.
Pencils lost a few points.
Hiking equipment was trailing.
Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.
Weights were up in heavy trading.
Light switches were off.
Mining equipment hit rock bottom.
Diapers remained unchanged.
Coca Cola fizzled.
Balloon prices were inflated.
And Scott Tissue touched a new bottom.

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